I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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