oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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