No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
