have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
