4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
