whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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