What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
There's always time for handjobs
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
