Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
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