He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought