dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
