She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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