Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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