***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
