Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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