best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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