My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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