bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
