I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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