I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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