yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Text me some of your sweat
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