Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize