I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize