Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
