suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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