Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
You did what with his pubic hair?
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