It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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