I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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