I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
