I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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