Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Randomize
