People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize