4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!