yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
