I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize