Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
