I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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