Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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