oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
We're too hungover to prance.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Couch. On fire.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
