I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
