I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
