Its about making memories worth repressing
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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