I'm going to jail i love you
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
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