No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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