Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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