after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
