Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
