There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
