you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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