I wish I only lived at night.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Randomize
