drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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